Aroused but not wet? Here’s some solutions

The causes of vaginal lubrication can be hormonal, medicinal, infectious, linked to lifestyle or even psychological. Let’s take a deeper look at the last one. In this article, we offer some solutions to cool down the relationship you have with your lubrication.

Busting the myth of the “right dose” of lubrication

Be aware that there is not too much, too little or a "just right" amount of lubrication. "There's no one perfect, universal amount of lubrication," says Heather Jeffcoat, MD of physical therapy, author of "Sex Without Pain: A Self-Treatment Guide to the Sex Life You Deserve." "The right amount of lubrication will vary from person to person," she says.

Lubrication is not imperative to the expression of desire

It is commonly accepted that lubrication is the expression of sexual desire. Therefore, the lack of lubrication can worry us about the level of desire that we have for the other. Know that it is not. The only valid indicator of your level of desire is how you feel.

Check your stress level

Stress is the number one enemy of natural lubrication. Pleasure in general, by the way.

It considerably limits the secretion of sex hormones and transforms them into cortisol, the stress hormone. It can therefore have a significant impact on your sex life: reduced libido, difficulty arousing desire and lack of lubrication.

Use self-exploration to reconnect

Vaginal dryness can also come from a lack of connection between desires and sex life. Ask yourself: does your sex life really correspond to your deepest desires? To find out, masturbation is your ally. It will allow you to experience your desires and your pleasure without the impulse of those of the other. It's you, in front of yourself. Do not hesitate to experiment with your fantasies, your sensations, to explore the areas of your body that make you feel good and see if that changes anything or not in the production of love juice.

Focus your attention on your sensations

Don't focus your attention too much on getting wet or not. Concentrate on your sensations, your feelings, etc. Don't hesitate to make your desire grow by stimulating your whole body: stomach, breasts, inner thighs...

Above all, take your time: let the desire rise and the pleasure invade you, without trying to get wet at all costs. The idea is just to do good. By freeing yourself from the injunction of performance and lubrication at all costs, you will free your body of its "obligations" and you will give it time to catch up with your brain, which is already excited!

Explore non-penetrative sex

Another solution to leave behind the obsession with lubrication is to practice non-penetrative sex: no penetration equals no “need” to get wet! This can be a great way to free your mind and focus on your body, and the techniques are legion!

Use lubricant!

There is no shame in adding lube on your vulva or into your vagina! The use of a suitable lubricant makes it possible to have more fluid, more pleasant and more comfortable intercourse. So don't hesitate!

Disclaimer: CLIMAX is not intended to replace healthcare professionals. We are here to support you in understanding your body, your desires and your pleasure. If vaginal dryness persists despite our advice, do not hesitate to consult a doctor.